As my sister is getting ready to have her second baby (YAAAAAAYYYY!!!) and Judah, my mom, and I are getting ready to make the pilgrimage up to Massachusetts I started thinking about some of things people used to tell me about birth and the first few months with a new baby that frankly, I just didn’t believe. Some of them are kind of funny now but I thought I’d write them down so maybe I can remember them when the time comes for us to have another baby. At the very least maybe they’ll help another mama out 🙂 So here they are, the 7 things people told me that I didn’t believe about having a baby:
1) During labor, you won’t even care.
This could be in reference to just about anything during the very unglamorous act of birthing a baby. Maybe it’s different if you choose to have an epidural or something but as I went the “crunchy” way I found this to be definitely true! I never thought that a) I’d spend most of labor butt naked and b) not even notice. My midwife or Josh would ask me things, kind things, like “Do you want to move to the bed? Do you want me to rub your back?” and I was like “I don’t care! Stop asking me questions, just do it and I’ll tell you if it’s wrong!”The screaming and shouting you see in TV? Apparently that can really happen too, especially if your name is Jessica and at some point you let everyone in the room know that those “pain free birth” classes are a load of crap.
2) There’s nothing like the first cry your baby makes.
Yep. Definitely true. The wonderful, surreal moment when they first put Judah on my belly and he was hollering to high heaven was the most beautiful sound I’ve ever heard. With everything else that happens right after a baby is born, you may not really notice how special it is but weeks and months later you can still see and hear it.
3) “Treasure every moment.”
So when I was in those first few weeks (and months) and running on about 2 minutes of sleep, this was the most annoying phrase thrown my way. I wanted to sleep! I wanted to eat food in peace! But this is another one that’s true, sometimes I miss those times nursing on the couch snuggled up with my tiny baby. I once fell asleep on the couch in the middle of the night while nursing Judah and while it’s not a move I recommend for safety reasons, it was so sweet and cozy.
4) “It goes by so fast.”
Another phrase that made me roll my eyes when Judah was two weeks old and I felt like such a wreck. I never thought I’d survive to see 3 months let alone a year or more. In those days and nights that seem to drag forever it’s hard to imagine what the next phase will be like. Sometimes I thought that, for sure, I’d be nursing every two hours for the rest of my life and I’d never have hot coffee or a clean house again. But…
5) “This too shall pass.”
Again, in the moment it feels like he will never nap longer than 30 minutes, he’ll never stop teething, he’ll never sit up or crawl, etc. But it does end. And this is especially true for me as a Babywise mom because we have an established schedule so even when things go off the rails and nothing seems to work, it does go back to normal eventually. I know one day I will long for the day when my biggest worries were about naps and childproofing the lower cabinets, even as I now long for only having to worry about feeding and sleeping (at least a little).
6) White noise helps with sleep.
For some reason, I was always skeptical about this and feared setting up a “dependency” for Judah. Then I realized, who cares, he sleeps better and deeper (science has even proven this) and if that’s all it takes – amen!
7) Just relax.
This is definitely hard to do. Especially for someone like me who is a big planner and likes to know where we’re going and how we’re going to get there. I’m not denying that some of those things are important but the great thing about babies is that they’re pretty adaptable. I can’t tell you the amount of stress I had over Judah napping in his swing. I didn’t want to create a bad habit! Truth is, if they’re under two months, it’s hard to create much of a habit of anything. I would’ve worried less about where he was napping and rolled with it a little more. If things don’t work, it’s never too late to fix it.
Adventures with the Morgans 